नए साल की शुभकामनाये

नए साल की शुभकामनाये!

Dear GlaxoIndians,

 

May the new year bring good health, peace, prosperity & success to you and your families. 

 

May the new year end world-strife, bring about amity among nations so peoples of the world live like a  वसुधैव कुटुम्बकम्!

 

We hope in the new year you would participate in our online community more regularly by sharing your thoughts and anecdotes of a shared past - or present - for being in touch with fellow GLAXOINDIANs and to make the idea of the online forum GLAXOINDIAN a greater success!

 

Thank you!

 

The Doctor in the 'Theatre'!

FH

A GlaxoIndian Medical Representative (MR) and his Area Sales Executive (ASE) went calling on a doctor in a village near a coastal town in AP. The doctor's attendant asked them to wait as the doctor 'was in the theatre'. They waited for a while and wanted to know whether the doctor would be long. The following conversation ensued:

MR:           "Will the doctor be long in coming?"

Attendant: "No Sir; just a few minutes."

MR:           "Has the doctor been in the 'theatre' for long?"

Attendant: "No Sir."

MR:           "So, it is a minor surgery, then?"

Attendant: "No Sir."

MR:           "But you said the doctor wouldn't be long?" 

Attendant: "Yes Sir."

The MR and the ASE were both perplexed by now.

MR:           "Oh, what kind of operation has he been conducting?"

Attendant: "He is fixing a tube-light Sir." 

Be Practical, ASE!

FH

The young ASE was lambasting the two senior medical reps based at his HQ. The team missed its sales budget in the previous month. The ASE was thrashed by his superiors in the ASEs’ monthly meeting.

The ASE was shouting that the current month’s sales budget plus the deficit of the previous month should be ‘covered’ by the twentieth and he didn’t mind how they did it.

We must clarify, all Glaxo ASEs used this expression, ‘I don’t know how you are going to do it, but do it you must!’ It did not have any ulterior implications; it was only a manner of speaking. Some of them used a variation of the statement, because they liked its roll on the tongue - which nevertheless meant the same: ‘Don't tell me why it can't done; tell me how it can be done!’ These imperatives were a part of the vocabulary of ‘Glaxo culture’ of the seventies.

One of the two senior medical reps was agitated and pleading with the ASE to understand that ‘if they could do it they would have done it’. They could not do it because there was high inventory with the AWDs; the ‘season was down’ and there was no way in the world that they could achieve what the ASE was demanding in the time he gave them.

The second senior medical rep was coolly listening to the shouted orders and the plaintive wails. He finally interjected, addressing his colleague: “Don’t worry my dear friend. He is our ASE. He is ordering us to do it. He will also tell us how to do it!” 

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Can you suggest a better or more apt caption to this story? Please mail your suggestions to indiaglaxo@gmail.com. We will publish your captions in our next post!

"I Visited he in July and then she became pregnant!"

FH

A Glaxo-Indian ASE was checking the MSL of a Medical Representative to appraise his "doctor coverage". When he came to a particular name he found three consecutive  "Date of Visit" columns blank. When the ASE asked the reason for  missing an important "call" for three consecutive campaigns, the Medical Representative explained, "Sir, I visited her in July and then she became pregnant!"

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In order to make navigation easier, we have merged the separate columns , "Sad to see you go", "Letters" and "Field Humour"  with the main body of the blog.

A GlaxoIndian's Narco Test!

FH

Many years ago a GLAXOINDIAN known for his phenomenal memory and excellent detailing abilities underwent surgery for hernia. The surgery was conducted under general anaesthesia. While the surgery was progressing, the surgeon who knew the GLAXOINDIAN quite well - and his insistence on detailing in full during every visit - wanted to pull his leg and asked him to detail. Even though groggy, the GLAXOINDIAN  delivered the complete detailing story while the operation was under way. Afterwards, while narrating the incident to colleagues, he quipped: "Thank God, the doctor did not ask me my opinion about him - instead of detailing!"

The 'Nouveau Riche' Farmer!

FH

Everyone knows that the nouveau riche – the new rich – would like to splash their wealth and generally show off - to show that they have arrived.  One such farmer from one of the rich farmland districts of Andhra Pradesh had to see a doctor for some ailment. The doctor suggested a stool examination. The farmer purchased a brand new stainless steel pitcher, filled it with - you know what - and brought it to the clinic.

As it happened, the farmer promised the doctor in an earlier visit that he would bring him some good desi ghee. On seeing the brand new stainless steel pitcher - covered with a leaf and neatly tied - the doctor assumed that the farmer was making good his promise after all. He asked his compounder to take it home and hand it over to amma garu – his mouth watering already in anticipation of a sumptuous lunch suffused with desi ghee. The unsuspecting lady accepted the pitcher and kept it on the dining table.

After a hectic day in the clinic the doctor went home for lunch. Everything was served – the doctor's wife had prepared his favourite dishes. And she opened the stainless steel container ... ... .

The Doctor had "Reservation"

FH

This is an anecdote recounted by a colleague from his experience in the seventies. He used to call on a top ophthalmologist/GP in a small town near his headquarters to seek prescriptions for Multivite-FM, as the doctor was a good prescriber of multivitamin brands. When the doctor did not respond even after a few visits, he asked him, ‘Dr. Do you have any reservations about my product?’ The small town doctor who was poor in English unfortunately understood that our friend posed the politically 'inappropriate' question and replied, ‘Yes, reservation, get the hell out of my clinic!’